Tag Archives: Dreams

Everyday NhanSense – Day 41


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Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 41’s Topic: What could have been.
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I do wonder often about “what could have been” had life went the way I envisioned it would five years ago.

So what did I have in mind?

Well, the plan was simple. I was going to take the summer off. No summer job or anything. I just wanted to relax. I felt burnt out from school, my senior year at college was just constant stress from working and I felt entitled to an easy summer at home with my family.

Let’s just say I had a lot of time to play video games and watch shows on Netflix. Nothing too exciting. I was a college grad with a diploma in hand. Due to my naive nature, I thought the real world could wait.

After summer, I just wanted to fire off some resumes and start the real job search. Assuming things would fall properly into place, I just felt like in my mind I was a shoo-in for any position I would apply for, which I believe would mean the search could end in a few short months. Tops.

I applied to various positions throughout the state of Washington, focusing on all kinds of newspapers and a few other types of publications such as magazines. I tunnel visioned extremely hard on “journalism only” gigs.

And why wouldn’t I?

I was the third highest position at my college newspaper as a copy chief. The only positions higher were editor-in-chief followed by managing editor. I had experience with other editor positions, was a reporter and participated in all kinds of other types of journalism-type projects for my paper, which included page design.

By all means, I ate, breathed and slept with journalism on the mind. The only thing I wanted was just to be able to call myself a professional journalist. It didn’t matter about the money or anything like that.

At one point, I wholeheartedly trusted everything journalism as a field had to offer for the world, and I saw it as a necessary occupation. I thought I could do my part and be involved with something that has written page-after-page of the world’s history.

I wanted to be a journalist so badly that it hurt. I wanted to be a reporter, an editor … just something that had to do with the journalism industry.

And then reality came to slap me right across the face.
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Everyday NhanSense – Day 27

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Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 27’s Topic: Getting rid of insomnia.
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Getting a good night’s sleep in a long time has been quite the treat. Catching Z’s after a day full of personal triumphs and channeling all the stress from the past two months into something productive has been empowering. It just feels nice being able to slip into bed, tucked under some warm sheets while feeling the “good” kind of tired, if you know what I mean.

I realize a lot of my prior blog posts have at times come off as panicky, and rightfully so I had all the reasons in the world to freak out.

But storms come and go, and I can finally at least say my sails are facing toward an ideal direction for once. I hope that my body can return back to a relatively, and more importantly, consistent sleeping schedule that I don’t have to feel embarrassed about (no more staying up until 3 a.m. or later because of insomnia.)

The insomnia was damaging to my well-being. My inability to sleep properly derived from all kinds of stress and personal pressure I put on myself (heck, I have even spotted some random white hairs in the mirror for a few weeks now.) I woke up exhausted, feeling upset at myself and everything going on in my life, but above all else I just felt like I had nothing to look forward to each day.
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Everyday NhanSense – Day 10


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Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 10’s Topic: Identity.
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“Nhan, who the heck are you?”

I guess it’s a good question you could probably ask me these days. And I wish I could give you a good, respectable answer. Truth be told, there are days where I don’t even know how to identify myself.

A lot has happened over the years. Some good things. Some bad things. And there are also some questionable things thrown into the mix as well. All of which has contributed in some shape or form toward creating my “identity” as a person to this day. However, let’s say our identities are like blank canvases, just waiting to be painted on with whatever comes to mind.

If you could take everything in your life and then splash it all over this canvas, what can people identity you as?

For some people, it’s pretty obvious.

Michael Jordan the basketball player.

Peyton Manning the quarterback.

Taylor Swift the singer.

There are millions of examples, but the point is these individuals all have their easily noted identities.

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Everyday NhanSense – Day 9


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Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 9’s Topic: Chasing after hares.
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The Japanese culture has a particular proverb that resonates with me.

二兎を追う者は一兎をも得ず。
(Ni usagi wo ou mono wa ichi usagi wo mo ezu.)
Literally: One who chases after two hares won’t catch even one.
Meaning: Trying to do two things at once will make you fail in both.

As human begins, we often feel stretched in multiple directions as far as interests go. It could be delving into photography one day or learning how to do a particular dance style the next. I am certainly guilty of this as well when it comes to pursuing these “hares” in life.

I want to do this. I want to do that. I want to do this while doing that. There are so many things I want to learn, but realistically I am aware I am not giving each respective activity enough attention. It requires time and energy to become proficient at something. Piano, singing, painting … everything for that matter.

Practice makes perfect, as they say. Continue reading

Everyday NhanSense – Day 4


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Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 4’s Topic: Mentality.
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I’ll be frank.

Over the years, I have brooded a lot. Whether it was thinking that life was unfair or how I needed to dwell on a particular thing for quite awhile, I sometimes find myself wanting to sulk in a corner to let the negativity run its course.

But it’s days like this where I try to remind myself I need to spend more time brewing, as in coming up with solutions, and less time brooding. After all, if you can direct your energy toward being a negative nancy, isn’t the opposite true as well?

It sounds so simple, but it goes to show how incredibly obvious it all is. If you are being pessimistic with yourself, why can’t you flip the script to become an optimist instead? Why continue to see the glass half empty if you can just see the glass half full?

Analogies aside, the point is I know my mentality is what defines how I approach a crisis. When I am in a pinch, if I don’t have the right mindset to tackle an obstacle, I can only expect disaster to head my direction.
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Daily NhanSense – Day 22


Daily NhanSense: Every day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 22’s Topic: Dreams.


Do you happen to remember that one particular question we’re all asked as children?

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

It’s such a novel question when you think about it. What do people, especially adults, hope to expect from a kid who barely knows that there is more to life than lunch and recess at school?

And let’s be real here. Every kid changes their mind at least 10,000,000+ times before they even have an inkling of what they want to do with their lives.

But I digress.

I remember a lot of my random answers as a child.

Firefighter. That’s a laugh. Even when I was younger, I wasn’t a very strong kid.

Be a doctor! My parents would tell me. Yeah, but I didn’t want to be one.

Be an engineer! “They make good money,” they would tell me. But math fell out of favor for me after the third grade. Not to mention, it’s safe to say that I don’t want to risk people’s lives with the bridges I design or anything like that. Cough. Cough.

Hey, the in-class simulations on the computer told me so!

Welp. That’s life in a nutshell. I think it’s odd how we are expected to lock in an answer so young and then expect ourselves to make that certain dream, that one particular nugget always looming in our imaginations, a reality at some point.

Sure, ideally, if someone had the destiny of being the greatest cardboard box designer in the world. By golly, that person should not let that potential go to waste.

Or so one would think.

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Daily NhanSense – Day 7


Daily NhanSense: Every day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 7’s Topic: Illness.


No matter how healthy you are, one is bound to get sick at some point.

I just spent the day lying in bed, but only after literally spending the entire previous night being unable to sleep due to severe pain.

Let’s just say trying to sleep holding still, while cradling what feels like a perpetual fireball in your stomach from going off because turning to your side makes it intensify, became quite the nighttime torture.

I am certainly glad that particular storm has passed, though I am definitely going to swear off a certain breakfast joint chain (I am not naming names) for life for giving me severe food poisoning.
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