The 54th Deadline: Traces of Joy

The 54th Deadline: Life’s always going to give you another chance if you’re constantly persistent.
Over the years, there was one thing I really wanted amid my depression-riddled days as a discouraged individual: independence.

Yup, independence.

Of all things, independence was something I didn’t have to my name. Heck, just even the sense of dignity was hard to come by without independence.

My lack of independence derived from needing to live with my parents after college graduation. That time really put a damper on my confidence. I felt incapable of getting any sort of job to support myself, let alone earn money to put into my bank account.

I lacked motivation. I lacked energy. I ate wrong. I slept too much. Everything accumulated in a bad way over time, so I felt my ability of taking care of myself fade away for quite awhile.

Obviously, we all have to leave the nest at some point. Mom and dad aren’t going to be around forever, and there’s a point where someone like me needed to grow up and be a bonafide adult for once in his life. Alas, it took many years before I was able to achieve some semblance of independence.

Piece-by-piece, I had to rediscover new passions to steer me toward different directions in life.

Fast-forward to now, and I guess you could say I have a lot more independence than I know what to do with in so many ways. Sure, I lack a lot of random necessities such as a vehicle to drive around town in, but the basic framework of independence is there.

I wake up at responsible hours, go to work, buy my own groceries and so forth.anime-girl-shopping-for-christmas-tree-smile-aki-eda

In lots of ways, I am grateful. I am happier because I can take care of myself in some fashion.

For instance, take today as an example.

Because it has been so dang hot at the start of this summer, I have been really needing some kind of reasonable way to stay cool.

Trust me. It gets really hot in the town I am living in, and just having some fans lying around wasn’t doing enough. I had three fans blowing at one point, and they all did zilch when the only thing happening was a constant circulation of hot air in a closed-off area.

So instead of suffering and literally sweating the summer heat, I made a big decision.

It was a big expense, but I had to buy an air conditioner. Because the space I live in lacks proper windows to use a regular air conditioner you attach on the outside, I had to get an inside variation that has the air vented outside like so.

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The 54th Deadline: Meet Mango

The 54th Deadline: Life’s always going to give you another chance if you’re constantly persistent.
Meet Mango. My new cat.


I adopted Mango this past weekend, and it’s safe to say I have become totally attached to this ball of fur.

I named her Mango because of her orange/yellow color and because she is so darn sweet in temperament. She follows me around already, meowing at me to pet and love her. She is by all means the ideal cat for someone like me.

I had to mull over the decision to adopt a cat carefully. I don’t make a lot of extra money per se, but I was willing to bite the bullet on the expenses to bring home a feline friend if I found the right cat.

Mango (originally named Ruby at the shelter) was a cat who was surrendered to the animal shelter because she was one animal too many. My guess is she was part of some kind of animal hoarder, but it’s not like she was dragged to the shelter due to behavioral problems.

She has already had kittens before at some point during her two years of age. She was deemed friendly and approachable at the shelter. There weren’t really a lot of negatives to factor in for her.

I ruled out getting a kitten because you actually have to be there during the initial stages during a kitty’s development to make sure they grow up correctly with the right behavioral habits.

I have to work a lot. I have some bills to pay, and though they are not that much compared to others, it still means I have to put in my share of hours each week to make sure I continue to stay afloat. As a result, it would mean Mango or any other cat I choose to adopt in the future would have to get used to not seeing me at home for extended times.

It’s tough, but it is what it is. It can’t be helped.

At least with an older cat, what you see is what you are more or less going to get when it comes to adoption. Mango had the right kind of personality I was looking for: calm, but at the same time she didn’t raise any red flags like she would rip up my stuff when I am not there.

Mango cried out at me during my shelter visits, and she was kind of enough to approach me and let me hold her. Not to mention, she didn’t look like some kind of troublemaker I had to think twice about leaving home alone for long periods of time, which is something that can’t be avoided in my current situation.

Before I knew it, I had already found myself signing the adoption papers to bring her home for real.

Mango so far has been a real joy to my life. Continue reading

Everyday NhanSense – Day 94

Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 94’s Topic: Cats.
Lately, part of my life has felt somewhat empty, but empty in the sense that I don’t have something to take care of other than myself.

With this in mind, the idea of me getting a cat in my situation has become more and more intriguing.

It’s starting to become an everyday occurrence I think about having a feline friend again to call my own. Ugh, I really want a kitty or two, but I do worry about the finances. If I were to get a cat, I wouldn’t be cheap about the whole spiel either.

I would want to make sure the cat is thoroughly entertained and is comfortable living at my place. I have two whole floors with a bit of extra room, but I would definitely keep the cat(s) indoors out of fear of something bad happening outside.

Obviously, food is something I have to pay for, along with litter and some other essentials. Not to mention, God forbid, my cat(s) in the near future don’t run into any health problems that would force me to go to the vet.

But otherwise, money aside, I think the companionship of having a cat would far exceed any dollar amount I could ever imagine in my current situation. Heck, there have been plenty of days I felt like having a cat to pet would have made my ordeals seem less daunting, putting my mind at ease. Continue reading

Everyday NhanSense – Day 81

anime girl with cat——————————————————————————————————————————————–
Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 81’s Topic: Cats.
As I browse through more pictures of my cats saved on file, the more apparent my true feelings come to the surface. Simply put, I miss my two babies a lot. Tux and Kuro meant a lot to me. They still do. I raised them since they were wee kittens, bonded with them on a personal level between pet and pet owner, which makes some days over here in this new town feel certainly lonely.

Magically, I wish I could just warp the two over here. But it wouldn’t be fair to the family I once lived with, as they are their cats as well. Sure, they didn’t love these two cats as much as me, but I was moving into a precarious and uncertain situation. The family was kicking me out of their home, after all, so I had to make the hard decision of leaving Tux and Kuro behind as a result.

I wasn’t sure if I could take care of my living situation, let alone adequately care for the two cats the way I would want them to be treated. I didn’t know where I was going to live, if I could get a job that paid me enough to afford rent, food and all the other expenses.

Of course, now that the ship has stabilized, I could probably take care of Tux and Kuro just fine. However, it’s not like I can just waltz into the family’s house and demand to have the two cats to take back here. Maybe in time, I will make an effort at formally adopting the two cats, but that family and I haven’t contacted one another for months.

In this regard, things are awkward between us. I have assumed Tux and Kuro have been just fine without me, so I have to trust that they are being loved. That’s all that really matters to me in this regard, honestly. The two cats were quite happy critters before I got kicked out, so I have prayed they have been still content with their lives.

It’s hard at times, but it’s all I can really do at the moment, aside from the alternative …

I could get another cat or two. Completely new ones to raise and love from the start again.
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Everyday NhanSense – Day 79

Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 79’s Topic: Patience.
I am by all means a patient person, but there are days I guess I lose this virtue when I feel things aren’t moving as fast as I would like.

This is why this particular thing at the store stood out to me.


It wasn’t expensive or anything, but I do like having “reminders” laid out for me throughout my desk to keep me in check. After all, life is all about realizing that certain things just develop after a duration, and for some people it takes longer than others for it to materialize.

For instance, many years ago, the only thing I kept telling myself that I wanted more than anything else was just this – independence.
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Everyday NhanSense – Day 58

Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 58’s Topic: Being weary.
I have felt a lot more tired than usual. Being weary isn’t pleasant, but I guess it’s to be expected. Perhaps I have overworked myself a bit too much. It’s part of my natural work ethic.

I don’t like that feeling of being lazy when I can just be productive. In my mind, not moving at work isn’t work, so I don’t like taking breaks. I keep going and going, barely slowing down if I can help it.

But at the same time, I think I am hurting myself, at least somewhat. Gradually, I am probably overexerting my mind and body. My normal “warning” sign is I get bloody noses after work when I have really pushed myself for a given day.

And let’s just say I’ve been getting a few bloody noses more than I would like. Once in a while, sure, but a few back-to-back instances? Not good.

Not good at all.

But that’s the slight bind I am in. I guess technically speaking I should ease up, but I don’t want to. I can’t just request some time off because I need to work, as I do need to make sure I keep income coming in to get back on my feet.

In other words, I can’t afford not to work. But that’s all right. Most people have to tough it out when they are hurting a bit. I don’t mind biting down on the bullet when I need to, even if my body aches or feels a little too sore on certain days.
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Everyday NhanSense – Day 19

Rin from the anime called "Little Busters."
Everyday NhanSense: Each day, I will blog about something that comes to mind. My goal is to practice writing about my hobbies, my interests, my opinions and so forth.

Day 19’s Topic: Cats.
I miss my two kitties … Tux and Kuro. Like, you don’t even know. It was an unfortunate consequence of my move over to this new town I am living in now – I had to leave my two babies behind.


As much as I would have liked to bring my two cats with me, I had to make a tough decision about whether I would risk dragging them into unknown territory and if I could practically afford to keep taking care of them.

Ultimately, I made the right move, but it’s still a crappy choice to me nonetheless. In a perfect world, I could have taken my two kitties with me. But alas, life isn’t always fair in this regard.

But again, people don’t know how much I love these two ever-so-cuddly furballs. I was with them the since day one when they were brought home as tiny, adorable and puffy balls of joy who mewed at everything, as they were just always so curious about the world.


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