Focusing on Negativity

I’m a pessimist in a lot of ways.

I find myself constantly thinking about the negative side of things rather than the positive aspects.

For instance, I’ve relied heavily on my in-game naming patterns to predict whether my ally/enemy player in a given game of “League of Legends” will be bad or not. Instead of thinking about how good a given player will be, I am quick to hone in on a poor performance.

Like last night, I played with someone whose username was just his/her initials. Based on my naming patterns, those who just put their initials tend to be bad players because it reflects a lack of creativity on their part – and an absence of creativity equates to less critical thinking abilities for gaming in my book.

Well, this player with the initials ends up being a so-so (at best) player as my game of LoL unfolded. So my naming patterns hit the nail on the head once again, but then my friend in the game mentioned how I kept bringing up how I knew this player was going to be a weak player. I kept repeating myself like a broken record, apparently. This player with initials would do something incorrect in the game, and then I would bring up further negative opinions about this player.

At this point, I realized that I basically do this ALL THE TIME, not just in gaming but for everything. When did I become the guy who points out the wrong in something? Is it someone I truly want to be?

I don’t know. Being a Negative Nhan is … who I am?

The odd part is, I’ve been trying to be more optimistic in life as well. I am trying to be calmer, more collected as I notice my friends become upset about things. I’ve started to become the guy who says “It’s cool” or “All good, don’t worry about it.”

It seems a bit contradictory …

On one hand, I am a guy who wants to feel happier about life in general, but then these constantly negative things (in my mind, at least) constantly happen, and so my perception shifts toward the “bad” side of the spectrum.

I think this transition point in my life has created an identity crisis for me to deal with, which means I should try to determine who I really want to be on a daily basis.

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3 thoughts on “Focusing on Negativity

  1. darkjade68

    Keep in mind that many things that we do, aren’t necessarily who we are, but rather Habits or Patterns that we’ve picked up along the way. And habits can be broken/changed, but it takes months of focus, after which it will become habit not to be that way. In your case you focus outward with your excessive negativity, other people focus inward. Years ago I used to have negative thoughts about myself, but at some point I was exposed to a method to get rid of that. Basically every time I would think something bad about myself, I would then think or say or write something that was the opposite of it. This neutralized the affects of the negativity. After a little while, I simply didn’t think negative things about myself, well on occasion, but not like I did before. Congrats on finishing School, and remember, often people who go straight from High School to College, miss out on some Lime Experiences that potentially make them more rounded. Granted, the experiences in College are awesome, but one of things you may be a bit behind on, is Self Reflection. Now that you have time, space for it, get to it. It also doesn’t hurt to ask yourself, what things in your past may have made you negative. Not to judge, but rather to use as a tool. Think of your Subconscious as a place Full of Stones. In Self Reflection, it’s a good process to Pick up a Stone look at it, and either Toss it away, or keep it. In your Case, being Reflexively Negative doesn’t sound like something you would like to continue, or sustain. When it happens, stop yourself, Reflect on it, and then toss it away. Chances are, at some point, you just wont do it anymore. It’s not just that you don’t want to be that person, it’s more like, it’s not really who you are, it’s just Behavior you picked up along the way. And, don’t judge yourself for it. In fact, don’t judge yourself for anything, Judgement in my experience is fairly useless.

    Good Luck to yah

    DarkJade-

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