When I game, I am like a different person. I don’t act shy or keep to myself – I am bold, confident and I say things the real-life me wouldn’t dare utter. There is something about talking to people with Skype or Ventrilo during a game that puts my mind at ease. Though I have never interacted in-person with most of the people I game with, I have spoken to them like I have known them forever. I honestly wish I could take my gamer personality with me whenever I meet new people face-to-face.
Perhaps it has to do with cyberspace barrier that separates me from the people I play with, where things like eye contact and body language can’t be judged. I can let my genuine personality shine through without superficial elements getting in the way.
The fact is, a lot of people tend to underestimate me as a person in real life. We are taught to not judge a book by its cover, but this is what people do to me. They perceive me as someone who is incompetent because I appear to lack confidence. However, I can actually be pleasantly surprising when I’m given the chance to prove myself.
I believe this is why gaming has always been so important to me throughout my life. In the gaming world, the opportunity to prove yourself is right in front of you. Talk is cheap, appearances are literally cosmetic as the only thing that matters is playing the game well. Because I can just play the game to the best of my ability, I can let my actions speak louder than anything else.
I imagine that a lot of things for me would be easier if I could transfer my gaming personality into real life. Maybe I could fare better in my first impressions with people. Nonetheless, old habits die hard. If I could just “be” a gamer in real life, then I would have done so by now, but it’s not like there is a switch inside of me that I can flick whenever I want to.
It’s like the premise of the game itself compels me to bring out a different personality to address the situation … So why can’t I call out the right personality for everything else I do?